Joke for today?

[eastendlu]

ITALIAN VIRGIN

Maria had just gotten married, and being a traditional Italian she was still a virgin.
On her wedding night, staying at her mother's house,

she was very nervous.
Her mother reassured her; "Don't worry, Maria, Tony's a good man.

Go upstairs and he'll take care of you. Meanwhile,

I'll be making pasta."
So, up she went.

When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest.
Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says,

"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest."
"Don't worry, Maria," says the mother,

"all good men have hairy chests.
Go back upstairs. He'll take good care of you."
So, up she went again.

When she got up in the bedroom,

Tony took off
his pants exposing his hairy legs.

Again, Maria ran downstairs to her mother.
"Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants

and he's got hairy legs!"

"Don't worry !
All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man.
G o back upstairs and he'll take good care of you."
So, up she went again.

When she got there, Tony took off his socks and on
his left foot he was missing three toes.

When Maria saw this, she ran downstairs.

"Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half !"

Her Mama said, "You stay here and stir the pasta....."

[Nebe]

Remember the plane that went down in the hudson?? These geese were seen fleeing the scene..

[gone fishin]

Blonde with a Emergency


Yesterday I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully got out of the car, and opened the trunk.


I took out two cardboard men, unfolded them, and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so lifelike you wouldn't believe. They are in trench coats. exposing their nude bodies and private parts to the approaching drivers.


To my surprise, cars started slowing down...looking at my lifelike men. And, of course, traffic started backing up. Everybody was tooting their horns and waving like crazy.


It wasn't long before a state trooper pulled up behind me. He got out of his car and started walking towards me. I could tell he was not a happy camper. "What's going on here?" "My car has a flat tire," I said calmly. "Well, what the heck are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road?" I couldn't believe that he didn't know. So, I told him, "Helloooooo, those are my emergency flashers."