| scottw |
11-17-2008 03:57 AM |
SAVE THE COUNTRY
START SMOKING
Demonization of smoking will be our greatest downfall if we truly aspire to become a successful Socialized Nation. I read a recent article declaring that smoking in the US in under 20% for the first time. No wonder we’re in such an economic mess, we’ve created and justified countless programs with the understanding that they will be funded with taxes on cigarettes while vilifying anyone who dares to light up. Apparently there aren’t enough smokers keep the boat afloat. It is our patriotic duty, as Joe Biden said, to do our part and pitch in and pay more taxes and start smoking. What is the tax on a pack of cigarettes now, 5-10 bucks? Imagine the money that could be raised if every American over the age of 15 began smoking one pack a day. The collection system is already in place so no need to create another large bureaucracy(although that might disappoint the dems) , just pay at the counter and SAVE AMERICA. Campaign posters could read, ”SMOKE FOR UNCLE SAM, the COOL NEW DEAL”. Oh, and about the “Socialized Nation” thing, well, here’s what the good ones all know. Smoking is imperative to the success of an oppressive nanny state. Think about it for a moment, Socialized Health Care, and Social Security for that matter, cannot possibly be successful in a nation where the population is largely healthy and living long lives. Cigarette smoking is the key to raising the necessary funds to support the state run healthcare system as well as the best reason to deny medical care to the masses later in life. This is what they do in Utopian Europe and China and we’re always told that we should be more like the Europeans, right? Here is the formula, start smoking at an early age to ensure maximum contributions to the STATE, opt out of or be denied free healthcare at the end of your life(however soon that may be) and don’t live long enough to collect your pension or Social Security and you will be doing the STATE a really big favor. You can RIP knowing that you gave it your all. Besides, who is the best known, most prominent and most lovingly adored smoker in our nation right now? That’s right, OBAMA. And if you think about it, he does bear a resemblance to JOE CAMEL . It all fits together quite nicely, so, BE PATRIOTIC and START SMOKING!
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